Chris waited until Jay and Bec had gone to bed before going to talk to his mum and dad. They were watching TV, but they turned it off as soon as he came into the room."I talked to Shahia today."Straight away, he had their complete attention. They were riveted as he described the conversation he'd had with Shahia. He was actually quite proud of the outcome, and he was quite chuffed when they agreed that he'd done well.It was his Dad who provided him with the opening he'd been waiting for, when he warned Chris that he'd only opened a huge can of worms, that he had committed to a great deal of work and heartache and he had no way out. Chris just stared at his dad, waiting for him to stop."Dad, I know all that. The question is what comes now."They nodded."Well, that guy from St Joseph's told me that Shahia loves to dance. So I'd like to invite her to the year eleven dance. But, of course, the problem is her brother and sisters. I was hoping that I could convince both of you to babysit. Would it help to relieve this pressure on his shoulders, the tightness in his throat? His eyes felt heavy and dry. They were always so dry.Saying goodbye to Liz was a road disappearing. It was an end of a "What could have been?" He didn't want to think in terms of regrets. Ray felt guilty at the thought. That made him mad. He had nothing to feel guilty about. Dreams of another woman do not measure up against Dana's affair. She wasn't worthy enough at this point. Ray didn't know if therapy was going to work for them. Dana would always be serving a penance that may never be fulfilled. She was to be punished forever. There might never be a forgiveness. And that wasn't love. Ray knew that. This anger was eating him. It was digesting him, and what was left was absolute. It was absolute, righteous and blindingly alone.Ray looked at his email account. Dana had written him."Any preferences?" she wrote.What followed was a list with 5 names of psychologists. It was the list of marriage.
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